Caution: this story deals with the realities of life in the mean cul-de-sacs (culs-de-sac?) of Bend. It may shock and disturb. You’ve been warned.
You know how after losing his family and fortune, Job said, “The thing that I feared has come upon me.” Remember that? Well, today, I am Job.
I’m fine with bugs. Spiders? No problem. Even snakes don’t really bother me that much, though I probably wouldn’t want to share a home with them. Mice, however, are unacceptable. And by unacceptable I mean: AHHHHHHHHHHH! We’ve successfully navigated 23 years of marriage with no mouses in the houses…except there was a narrow brush back in 1990 when I had a dream that I saw one in the garage and wasn’t able to sleep for about 12 years.
So, you know where this is going. Last night, Josiah thought he saw a mouse run through the family room. In fact, he was so convinced that he decided to sleep with his door closed (cute, how he thinks the mouse could never get under the two-inch gap below his door.) Steve followed the United Nations Peacekeeping Protocol for Informing Your Wife of Rodents or Bounced Checks and calmly explained that MAYBE Joe had seen something scampery in the nether regions of our home. He also mentioned that there is a small hole in our laundry room wall from some repair work being done on our furnace and – hey – what if a mouse might see that hole and mistake it for the door to the Hilton? Steve (my hero) went down to cover the hole and discovered…the mouse, luggage in hand, checking in for the weekend. Actually, no luggage and there was no paperwork involved…just a very scared and speedy mouse, racing back up the hole and a very determined Steve, plugging that thing up so he can remain married to the wife of his youth.
So, it appears that I have survived the mouse visitation….but I haven’t been downstairs yet. I’m telling you, if I run into a rodent this house will be on the market by Saturday.
With no love for the ROUS’s,
Bo
Well, even Indy had an issue with snakes. I’ll be praying for your deliverance . . .
Deliverance from mouse-a-phobia would be a great thing. I even tried to put a picture of a real one on my post, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. 🙂 Steve assures me that this guy is gone for good and that we will never see another mouse as long as we both shall live but…I don’t know….
Last fall, a mouse caught a ride on a futon that had been in our garage to the upstairs guest room. One night while reading in bed, he ran across our room. He stopped and looked me dead in the eyes and then continued on his way. The next morning I went to the store and bought enough poison to kill 100 mice (just in case). The invader died two days later and the house returned to it’s peaceful state.
I still have some left over poison if you happen to need it.
Thanks, Jamie…Steve thinks we’ve triumphed in man vs. mouse, but I’ll let you know if I need the goods! 🙂
hahaha, Bo you are so funny!